Magnesite, P.I., in "The Catgirl Caper" by Austin G. Loomis based on a concept by David Johnston opening scene from an original by Mark Latus Crystal Tokyo, September 15, 2846 AD Margrave's looking a lot twitchier than usual, but that's natural in this kind of situation. For some strange reason, waking up to find out you just turned a paying customer into hamburger is the sort of thing that can really upset dames. Definitely ruins the mood. "If you're done brooding, can we get back to my little problem?" "Sure, doll, but what do you expect *me* to do about it? Sounds like an open and shut case to me -- you got a little excited and tore your client to ribbons. Maybe you can plea-bargain down to manslaughter, but--" "Dammit, I didn't kill him! I--" "Not on purpose, sure. Bad for business. But while my memories of the Kingdom days are a little hazy," not to mention mixed with scraps of Bogie, "I seem to remember when Calcite worked for me, he'd show up sometimes with your claw-marks on him. Nothing *he* couldn't handle, but these humans are a lot more fragile." "Idiot! I've been in business for eight hundred years, give or take a fast decade. Have you ever heard of *any* of my clients tur- ning up dead before?" I decide not to point out that I missed the first 600-some years of her career because I was locked in Serenity's trophy room, seeing as how it doesn't matter. "No. If they did, you'd never have lasted this long." "Pree-cisely. Nobody gets hurt unless they request it, and even then, I *know* where to draw the line." Makes sense, but I'm wondering how she manages it. Like I said, humans break easily, and loss of control in...shall we say, intimate moments...is sort of a given. "So how--?" "--do I manage? There's what I call a suppressor reflex...though `reflex' is probably the wrong word, since I have to consciously engage it. I think it's a leftover from Metallia's directed evolution. Keeps the breeding stock from tearing each other apart. Part of my mind stays in control and minimizes the biting and clawing. Accessing it is almost second nature to clawed types like me. I learned how to activate it pretty young, but I had to teach Titanite--" "*Titanite*? What's this got to do with her?" "Think about it, `Sam.' She's a youma, but her lovers have all been humans. Someone had to teach her how not to injure them, and it never occurred to her relatives. Azzie and Pyr never had the problem, and while Cal's self-control kept him from injuring human lovers, it never occurred to him that his sister was in the same boat. Idiot kept thinking of Ti as the sweet and innocent kid he watched over and didn't notice she'd grown up. So I taught her a few things she needed to know." That creates a few interesting mental pictures. "What exactly did you teach her--?" "Get your mind out of the gutter! She got purely theoretical instruction, not practical demos. Don't *ever* suggest otherwise! And *definitely* nothing hands-on!" Hmmm, obviously a little twitchy on *that* subject. Still, Polaris is her major defender, so she can't get stories circulating that might alienate the kid. Not after all this time conning her into thinking she's got a "heart of gold," whatever in the Abyss that means. Probably time to work our way back to the reason she's here. "Okay, so you've got this mental switch that keeps you from injuring a weaker partner. I take it you didn't have to worry about this with Cal." "Right. No more than he has to worry about Minako. Or vice versa." "So you've been stuck leaving the switch on for eight centuries. Must be as irritating as having a piece of mimic fungus on your ankle all that time. So last night you finally hit your limit, overrode the reflex, or didn't even trigger it, and ripped that poor shmuck to--" "Dammitall, I keep telling you I *didn't!* I've been framed! Someone used me to kill him!" "That went by me a little fast, sweetheart. Slow down and take it from the top." "Somebody shut down the suppressor reflex. Maybe a psychic, maybe they used magic, but the point is, they did it by remote control. Whoever they are, however they worked it, they wanted to get rid of Sean, and they turned me into their murder weapon." "Interesting theory. So why not go to Rei and have her read your mind? That would establish you're innocent...of this anyway." She shakes her head. "Two problems. One, that'll only prove *I* believe that's what happened. If I really *have* gone non-linear, then my sense of reality is whacked and my memories aren't exactly the best evidence. Two, I *really* don't want her rummaging around in my head again." "Could be a matter of life or death, kid." "Yeah, but not the way you think. See, that's Three, the *real* problem. The reading would have to be done at a public inquest, and publicity for *this* mess is the last thing I need! Even if I get found innocent it's the charge that'll be remembered. How many clients am I going to get if rumors start that I might tear them limb from limb? This could ruin me. I'm not ready to start getting old!" She's getting hysterical, and obviously, she realizes it, because she stops and takes a deep breath before she goes on, calmed down. "Now, if I can prove I was mind-controlled and produce the mastermind, then this doesn't have to come to trial. I've got enough connections to get this quietly swept under the rug, same as that Adamite mess--" She stops herself, like she'd said something she wasn't supposed to. That got my attention. "That *what* mess?" A cover-up here in perfectville? Sounds like one of my favorite pipe-dreams. "Before your time and *not important.*" The tone of her voice says it all. She's not talking -- but she doesn't have to. She already said enough -- or too much, depending on your point of view. Even here in happyland, they still have to put the kibosh on unpleasant news some- times. Kind of thing that warms the cockles of my heart to hear, or at least it would if I still had the original ticker. "Always assuming it was a human-style heart in the first place." Metallia damn it, was I narrating out loud again? "Don't worry about it. We're all used to it by now." Gee thanks, lady. Your confidence is underwhelming. "Any time. -- Getting back to business, I need a discreet investigation, and since that's what it says on your door, that's where you come in." "Why not tell your story to the police?" "Because I have zero proof and can't trust them to take this investigation seriously. On the other hand, *you* owe me quite a bit, which should...motivate you suitably." I have to smile. "Except that if you get the big Flame Sniper--" "All your IOUs pass to Ti according to my will." Now *she's* smiling and *I'm* not. I *really* don't want to be in debt to little miss Sailor Wannabe. She'd love an excuse to hang me out to dry! Damn Renegades. Aren't they supposed to forgive and forget? "Okay, I get the point. So if I find the real killer..." "I'll cancel all your debts for the 28th century." "I was thinking more like all of them. From 2688 onward." I still owe her quite a bit from when they brought me back, plus a few favors this century. "Not a chance." I study her and realize she's not bluffing. Her life's on the line here and she's *still* not going to give an inch. Hell of a dame. Makes me wish I was still flesh and blood. "You're a real hardcase, lady--" "Takes one to know one, Maggie." "--but that crack just cost you another 25 years. Take it or leave it." If she can be stone-faced about this, so can I. She glares at me before muttering, "Fine, fine. Solve this and we're quits from 2700 to 2825." I figure that's the best I'm going to get. "Congratulations, babe. You've just hired the best PI in Crystal Tokyo." "I just hired the *only* PI in Crystal Tokyo." "Details, details. Now I'll just fill out a contract, you can sign it, and I'll get to work. While I'm doing that, you can tell me about the late Mr. Barker." Time to get my brain in gear. So far, I'd say there are three main possibilities. One, it's just the way it looks from the outside. Margrave slipped up, and either she's trying to set up a good story or she suppressed the memory. Two, she's telling the truth. Someone had it in for Barker and used her to get him killed at a distance. Or three, which doesn't seem to have occurred to her yet, *she's* the real target and Barker is just an innocent bystander, caught in the crossfire. She rips the guy apart, the senshi fry her for it, the killer has what they want, and no one's the wiser. Question is, who hates her that much? Apart from a lot of jealous wives and girlfriends, that is. This could be trickier than I thought, but whoever did it, I'd better find an answer fast. The clock is ticking. * * * The next morning finds me stepping into the CT offices of the late Sean Barker's employers, wearing somebody else's face. My own rugged Bogie- esque features might be a little bit distinctive, so just to stay with my preferred motif, I'm looking like Jack Nicholson as Jake Gittes. I've found that face works surprisingly well -- people don't remember it so much, just the scar on the nostril. Margrave said Barker'd mentioned a name once or twice -- a guy from the head office who was supposed to be coming to check on the big mysterious project Barker and his friends were working on. She left me with a name and a description. Time to do some social engineering and see if I can use them. "Excuse me," I ask the girl behind the desk. "Is Mr. Lisker here yet? I needed to have a word with him." [he shanghais Lisker] "I don't know who you are, mister, but if you think you can get away with this--" "Thanks, Lisker." I make a quick throat-clearing noise while I readjust my larynx. "Your voice was the only thing I needed." His eyes go wide and he sweatdrops. Given that I said that in his voice instead of my own, I can't say I blame him. [] "Mr. Lisker? There was a man here to speak with you--" "Yes, yes. We met already. I told him I gave at the office." [meets with Guyot] The head of the Kronos Corporation's office here in happyland is a tall thin albino with a mighty pompadour. "Mr. Reinhardt..." How the Abyss do you pronounce a name like "Guyot" anyway? "Gyuo?" I try. "Giro?" He takes pity on me. "Gio, with a hard G." His voice seems to come rumbling up from somewhere around his ankles. "And you must be Mr. Lisker." "I suppose I must, at that." [into office of project Barker was heading up -- Agito, Sho, Tetsuro -- security flap] "You are *not* the real Oswald Lisker," Makishima says coldly. "You knew that all along." I change back to the Nicholson face. Not to Bogie, that'd give too much away. "Didn't you?" "I suspected, certainly. What determined it was when you took the bait and said you'd exchanged jokes with Vogel recently. Preston Vogel hasn't been in charge of the New York office for several years. And when he was, he had no discernible sense of humor, or so I'm told anyway. Security is already on its way up." "Well, they're going to have a little trouble. Y'see, I *know* one of you had something to do with your buddy Barker's death, and I'm not leaving until I have a better idea who." Fukamachi and Segawa both get a look on their faces like I must have had right after my green-haired hatchetman stabbed me. They stare at Makishima, who's still cool as a cucumber. "Is that what you suppose? That one of us killed Sean?" [Mags forcibly ejected -- "I'll be back"] [gets visit from bully (Albite, running Agito) advising him to lay off, mentioning something known only to Kingdom survivors] Whoever that was, he knew me back in the Kingdom. Except that's not possible. I know all the other survivors of Shaizaar, and if any of them wanted me dead, I'd already *be* dead. Well, maybe not *all* the survivors, now that I think. I mean, sure, the rumor that Nephrite's assistant had gotten out before the end was never really confirmed, but from the stories I've seen about this Twilight character, I'd have to say she made it after all. Sure, I never actually *met* Twilight -- its career happened while I was Calcite's paperweight -- but the powers sound a lot like Chrysolite's cloaking abilities. Wonder if she was another damn Renegade. Not that it matters anyway -- Twilight vanished not long after Cal and his merry minions dropped off the map. And a number of small-timers decided, one by one, with upsurges every time they found a new Senshi, that getting obliterated by girls in miniskirts was not a good career move and made their own travel plans, leaving through the Tokyo warpgate and vanishing into the crowd. But like I say, they were low-rankers, about the same power-level as Margrave herself, but without the low animal cunning. It'd be years before Usagi became Serenity and unsealed the mana wells, so they were all trapped in the zone. None of them thought of a plan like her barter system or my rather grandiose Senshi-removal scheme; they had to steal human life- energy, like I did right after I hit Earth, hoping their predations'd be written off as just a few more cases of Juuban Syndrome, and most of them got picked off, one by one over the years, by one "good guy" or another. The ones that didn't, wound up dead anyway fighting the Acolytes. At least, I can't find any record of them after the final battle and Serenity's big awakening. [little chat with Ti -- he tells her she killed Jadeite -- how does he know?] "Your relatives have let things slip, over the decades since I've been up and about. Things they didn't mean to. I finally asked Margrave, and she confirmed it. -- You don't seem surprised, kid." "Not really. I've suspected as much for a long time. I had dreams about it for a while after we got back from the MegaTokyo mess. I didn't really remember them, but I kept getting these weird kind of image-flashes when I thought about him. It's been a long time, but I think I was *still* getting them when I took my little trip to Nerima." "But you didn't know for sure until now." "Like I say, I suspected. But being certain would mean asking Cal and the others, and they still have a certain mental picture of me. Somehow, I can't quite see going up to him and asking, `Cal, did I really kill Jadeite, or do I just think I did?'" She sighs. "Someday, though. Someday, they'll be ready for me to ask them that. And if you or anyone tells them that I know *before* I do...I'll be *very* put out." What's she going to do about it, I wonder. If she's trying to maintain her innocent image, she can't kill whoever tells her folks. "Well, no." I've really got to watch the narrating. "But there are ways of retaliating that don't cause any harm or even pain. On the physical level, anyway." All at once, I feel my body starting to squeeze itself into some new shape. And I do mean "squeeze" -- I can *feel* my arms and legs shrinking, my torso collapsing in on itself. My head seems to be going slower than the rest of me... [she superdeforms him] "I want to forgive you, Mags. But by Jesus, Buddha and even Metallia, you *don't* make it easy." [she tosses him out the window] [goes back to Kronos, looks in Agito's files, discovers payments from a source in NAUS - "Albert White"] Then I remember who made that crack about [whatever it was]. The guy who almost joined my legion right after Azurite did. Chromite. Except it turned out that wasn't really his name, just the name he used in Deathbridge. He'd been using a different name in every major city in the Kingdom, spying on pretty much everyone for more or less everyone else. The whole thing came out after Bornite (that's what he called himself in Kel Shaizaar) got the Big Sleep for mouthing off to Beryl, right after Zoisite's death. Seems he'd written himself up a full confession regarding his double (really more like a quadruple, squared) life, and arranged for it to come out in the event of his death or encrystallization. It revealed a few secrets a number of important youma would rather have kept buried; quite a few heads rolled over the next weeks. Except it's not possible. It can't be him. When the Kingdom fell, he was part of the decor in the Eternal Sleep Chamber, and the only ones who got out of *that* place alive were all ambulatory. Well, except Jadeite, but he got *very* lucky. [Agito shows up, Mags says: "tell Mr. White that Magnesite would like to talk business with him"] [meeting with Albite -- he hops bodies to stay ahead of Mags' attempts at arm-twisting] "If you're done harassing *him,*" Albite asks from behind me, "can we talk?" I let Makishima drop as a pair of handcuffs sprouts out of my right wrist. I grab Albite's arm and clap the cuffs on him -- no way he's getting away from me now. "You just don't learn, do you?" His face flickers and I find I'm staring into the eyes of a girl about 25, blond hair and a reddish- orange jumpsuit from the Buck Gordon collection. "Is there a problem?" she asks me, and follows it up with "Hey, wait a minute! Where am I? Who are you?" "Are you starting to get the point?" Albite asks as he comes up behind me again. "Or do we have to go through this with everyone in Crystal Tokyo?" [] "You said something to Calcite, right before your plan to obliterate the Senshi went pear-shaped on you. You asked him, melodramatically enough I thought, if he knew the exact moment when life turns to death. At the risk of coming across even hammier than you, I know it *quite* well. I've been there too. And like you, I came out the other side as something...better...than I'd been before." I don't really hear the last part at the time he's saying it. When he talks about the moment between life and death, I start to freak. "How...?" I breathe. "How do *you* know what I said? You weren't there -- nobody saw what happened except me, the Renegades and the Senshi! Even Ami's precious boyfriend didn't show up!" He just smiles. "You're half-right -- two-thirds if you count the bit about Ami's boyfriend, whatever happened to him. I wasn't there in the flesh, but I saw what happened. That's one of the advantages of my new...status." [motive] "She would have recognized me sooner or later, and I really couldn't have that." [Albite explains his ultimate plan] "No way," I gasp. "No friggin' way." "As these humans would put it, *every* way. I've got a tracer on the cat. I was hoping she'd walk into the palace and stand trial by ordeal. Then I could have taken over Serenity herself...or should I say Sailor Moon? What sort of deal did you strike with her, anyway?" "The same sort I'd have made with Beryl if we'd won. I stay out of her way, she doesn't Moon Eternal Halation me into the middle of next millennium." "So you say. I doubt the little bimbo would be that daring, myself. Not that it would have helped her anyway. If she didn't attend the trial, I'd simply use the flame-dame to get to her. And then I'd have used her to control the Silver Crystal and wish me *out* of this fragging jailspace." [he invites Mags on board] "No?" He's puzzled, and I can't say I blame him. "Why the Abyss not? You could be my right-hand youma. You could be a General, the way you always wanted to be. General Magnesite. Why turn *that* down?" It takes a few moments of thought, but I figure out why I turned him down. Because in this town, the powers of "evil" have a tendency to get their asses kicked up around their ears. And like I said, I *really* don't feel like going up against Serenity. If Albite's really crazy enough to try it, he can get himself killed just fine without my help. "Maybe you're right." Oh shit, I said all that out loud, didn't I? "Maybe I *am* crazy." And I was doing so well. "Maybe trying to succeed where Beryl failed *is* signing my own death warrant. But you know something? After 800-some years in *this* crystal, I don't really give a pair of gardinel's kidneys!" There's a feeling like the entire universe is sliding a foot to its own left as he wraps his thoughts around my mind. [] From a distance, I watch my body collapse and start writhing and twitching in ways human bodies don't. He doesn't seem to know how to control a body made of psychoplasm. Good thing for Crystal Tokyo, not so hot for him. Or for me, come to think. He lies there in a burbling puddle for several minutes, while people run and scream all around us. Might be entertaining any other time, but sooner or later he's going to get control of my body, and then I'll be thoroughly screwed. Matter of fact, he's just starting to grow himself some feet and legs. Any second now, he'll work his way up to putting a set of arms on this body. If he forms a head, I'm toast. "Rin, pyou, tou..." No way. What's *she* doing here? "...kai, sha, jin..." This could be the worst day of my life. "...retsu, zai, zen..." Or my lucky day. I'm about to find out which. "...AKURYOU TAISAN!" The ofuda hits our newly shaped forehead like a kiss from a blowtorch. This must be one of her specials, the ones that take her about a week to make and can squelch any evil entity short of the second coming of Metallia. As long as it's spiritual in nature, anyway. The sheer power-level is the only reason I feel anything from this one, though I suspect she's also got some targeted specifically for a harmless sentient psychoplasmic construct like yours truly. Pro- bably seems like a sensible precaution -- she doesn't want to get caught with her skirt down again like she did back in the twentieth. Now that she knows what I am, what she's dealing with, she's ready for me. They all are. That's another reason I'm not going to do anything deliberately stupid. If it seems funny, or irrelevant, for me to be thinking about things like that at a time like this, it's not. What *is* funny, at least to me, and all too relevant as well, is how the human, or in my case the youman, mind can find ways to distract itself when it feels like you're being torn apart cell by cell. Of course, it'd be a lot funnier if it was somebody *else* feeling all this pain, not me, but at least I can console myself with the knowledge that Albite must be going through it too. I can tell; I can hear him -- well, "screaming his lungs out" is really the wrong word for it, seeing as how this body doesn't actually have any, and if it did they'd technically be mine any- way, but you get the idea. Reminds me of the good old days. There's one final searing moment when I almost think I understand what the DD Girls' mother must have felt when her impatient brood clawed their way squabbling into the light, then it's over. I'm lying on the ground, gasping for breath I don't actually need, physically anyway. I try to get to my feet, but I don't seem to have any. Albite's focus on shaping himself a body must have been wrecked by the stress of being exorcised. First things first, then. I concentrate on getting back in shape. Two arms, two legs, one head (all attached to a torso), face like a matinee idol, the rumpled suit, trenchcoat, and finally the fedora. "You took your sweet time getting here, Rei." "You're welcome, Maggie. Nice to see you too." [palace -- Serenity seen talking with Mizuno-sensei] "Any luck?" "None whatever. I'm not even any closer to finding out *when* it happened, let alone *how,* or what to do about it." [she takes the statement Mags has given Rei] There's a sensation like gentle fingers brushing my forehead. "Done and done. I believe we can dismiss any charges against Margrave." [she tops off his tank with ginzuishou energy, then dismisses him] [he sticks around to listen as she talks with Endymion] "I'm sure it'll all work out, Usako. We were there, remember?" "You always say that, Endy-chan. And for a little while, it seems to be all right. But it doesn't go away. Not for good." "It will, riceball head. Believe me, it'll all work out." He's serious about this, whatever it is. The only time he calls her "odango atama" is when she starts getting hysterical and acting like the Tsukino Usagi of yore. "Once a century, you get twitchy about this, and I have to keep telling you it'll all work out. Why can't you just believe me, Sere-chan? You know I'd never lie to you." "I know, Endy-chan...but you're not telling me the whole truth. If you know something I don't -- if you know how your problem will be resolved -- why can't you just *tell* me?" "I made a promise." He bites off a "baka!" "A promise? To whom?" "That's...one of the things I promised not to tell. Now, since we're not going to settle this until we *do* settle it, do you suppose we could talk about something else?" "I suppose." But she doesn't sound happy about the problem, whatever it is. "This Albite sounds like a major threat." "Potentially, yes. Just as Magnesite was a danger to us before we knew what we were dealing with. But now that I know the true nature of our hard-boiled youma, I can destroy him if he does anything...rash, and he knows it. Just so, now that I'm aware that Albite is out there, I can block him out of our dimension. No, Endymion. As long as I have the ginzuishou, Albite is no threat to my city." Then I hear her voice in my head. <> No need to tell me twice. She's a lot nicer about it than Beryl would have been, but I can still feel the heavy weapon inside the velvet glove. _Here's lookin' at Your Majesty,_ I think as flippantly as I can manage, then blink out of the palace and start walking back to my office. _That's one thing I keep forgetting,_ I think to myself. She may still *act* a lot like that ditz Usagi, but when it comes down to it, she's got a core of twisted blue steel and dynamite that Beryl would have envied. "Spare change, mister?" [encounter with Naru] "I met a guy in Hollywood once," Marv said, "who told me how to write a screenplay. On page thirty-two, Gregory Peck stands up in his trenchcoat and tells everyone what the movie's all about. On page ninety-six, Peck stands up in his trenchcoat again and reminds us all what the movie's about, just in case we missed it the first time. On page one-twenty-eight, the movie's over. Peck slings the trenchcoat over his shoulder and walks off into a spiritual dawn." I kind of liked that movie, actually. It didn't have Bogie in it, but it was still a good one. [] KYASUTO Magunesaito...GENDA Tesshou Maagureibu...ORIKASA Ai/Celeste P. Burchard Ozuworudo Risukaa...WAKAMOTO Norio Reiharuto Gyuo...SHIBATA Hidekatsu FUKAMACHI Shou...KUSAO Takeshi SEGAWA Tetsurou...SHIOYA Yoku MAKISHIMA Agito...TANAKA Hideyuki Taitanaito...SHIINA Hekiru Alubaito...NAKAO Ryuusei HINO Rei...TOMIZAWA Michie/Katie Griffin Neo Kuin Sereniti...MITSUISHI Kotono/Terri Hawkes MIZUNO Ami...HISAKAWA Aya/Karen Bernstein Kingu Endimion...FURUYA Tohru/Toby Proctor OUSAKA Naru...KAKINUMA Shino/Mary Long Author's Notes Well, here it is, my first (but hopefully not last) SME fanfic. For those of you who came in late, my hands-on involvement with SME began in the fall of '97, when I started writing to Mark Latus (my personal favorite of the SME authors) with assorted suggestions -- some seiyuu possibilities (I suggested casting Ranma voices as Bratpackers), the Sentai bogosity (contrary to what Mark claims, I did not in fact "insist" on his doing the Negaranger story; I suggested the germ of the idea [as quoted in Behind the Scenes v.4] and said I'd like to see the result, but that's the extent I remember my involvement taking), and a few character names he needed from other sources (Amano and Miss Ayumi in Version 2.0.2). When he announced the Magnesite Mystery Tour, I decided to hop on board, and here I am. Credit Where Credit Is Due Dept.: Magnesite, Margrave and Titanite were created by the ever-competent Mark Latus, whom I thank for throwing this story idea open to public usage. Mags did in fact recognize the crazy woman he met at the end, and so did you if you've watched any substantial amount of Sailor Moon in either language; for her sad story, read "The Breaking Point," now available on Mark's homepage. The story of their first meeting is told in Mark's story "Refugees," the first tale of the DKR, also part of the SME section of his page. For the story of their next meeting, over a century later, check out Frank Barr's "The Case of the Missing Senshi," likewise available in Magnesite's Office. For the real scoop on something in which the youma who disappeared when the Acolytes came may well have been involved, take a look at "Life During Wartime," a work currently in progress at http://www.geocities.com/Tokyo/Temple/1810 (bet you were wondering when I was going to give out the URL, hm?). And for a glimpse of the Acolytes of Silence their own bad selves, "Heart of Fire" (also by Mark) contains the most data of any SME story I know of. Chrysolite, mentioned passim, was created by Berk' Watkins, who has told, and is still telling, her story in his Zodiac Grand Tour. She doesn't appear in the present narrative because at the time it takes place, her body was trapped in a block of solidified mana and her mind was adrift in Helcion. King Endymion's "condition," the problem it caused, and the unusual solution Serenity found for that problem, are all discussed in Andy Combs' not-really-a-lemon "Rabbit Test," which became the start of the Crystal Tokyo Saga. The future events to which he and Serenity obliquely allude are seen, in some more detail, in Combs' second CTS story, "Crystal Renegades," the tale in which the CTS and DKR series were united to become the core of SME. These and other tales are at http://members.xoom.com/Warthog/sme_main.html (the official Sailor Moon Expanded homepage) for your reading pleasure. Albite is my own creation. If I can spare the energy, you'll be seeing more of him. Thanks to Elizabeth McCoy, the Archangel of Archives and Demon Princess of Nitpicking, for suggesting his MO, in those stories, with her character Quicksilver Hawke. His appearance is modelled on Rene d'Anclaude from _Armitage III_, which is copyright OCHI Hiroyuki, AIC and Pioneer. Sho, Tetsuro, Lisker, Agito and Guyot (whose name I saw spelled that way once on the box for a model kit of his Zoalord form) are, of course, from TAKAYA Yoshiki's _Bio-Booster Armor GUYVER_, which is copyright to him, Tokuma Shouten (who published the original Guyver manga in the pages of _Shounen Captain_), Studio Movic, and Bandai. The name and personality of Preston Vogel were swiped from Walt Disney Television Animation's _Gargoyles_, copyright the cruel and magnificent Disney empire. The quote about how to write a screenplay was uttered by Marvin "Shake" Tiller, good-ol'-boy football player turned star of the New York Giants turned writer, in Dan Jenkins' very funny _Life Its Ownself: the semi- tougher adventures of Billy Clyde Puckett and them_. The reaction that the movie in question was a good one was the reaction of Big Ed Bookman, Texas oilman, when Shake made the observation. The present author has reconstructed both from memory at no real personal expense. Rei, Serenity, Endymion, and other canonical Bishoujo Senshi Sailormoon characters were created by TAKEUCHI Naoko and are copyright jointly to her, Koudansha (who published her Sailor Senshi stories for six years in _Runrun_ and _Nakayoshi_), Touei Animation, and either TV Asahi or Fuji TV, depending on which season. As Toei products, they are sub- licensed to the good folks at Bandai. The corporate entities named above rule the Earth, roaming it in large herds. We (Mark and I and the other SME writers) are but small furry creatures from Alpha Centauri, rummaging in the dirt churned up by their passing. -- aoomis@ocean.st.usm.edu | "I can't be bothered with these bozos!" RSFCP -- Real Small Furry | the Inflatable Urd muttered as she con- Creatures Press (Studio | tinued to hurtle down the road, high on Chibi Gadom imprint) | helium and with vengeance on her mind.